After A Wonderful Birth This Is What I’ll Do Again 

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After having both a hospital birth and a home birth, I will definitely choose a home birth for baby number three.

I’m the mama of two beautiful babies born eighteen months apart.  I delivered both of them naturally in water.  My son was born at a birth center connected to a hospital and my daughter was born at home.  After having both a home birth and a hospital birth, I will definitely choose a home birth for baby number three.  

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I was so nervous about the birth process as a first time mom

The relief I felt walking out the hospital doors after delivering my son made me realize how nervous I’d been about the whole birth experience. My husband carried our baby in the carseat and I waddled behind them. I breathed in the fresh air, feeling so thankful for a healthy baby boy and an uncomplicated birth.

There are so many unknowns for a first time mom going into labor. I know that the confidence I gained birthing my son in the hospital helped me have a better birth with my daughter at home. But there are a few other factors that made my home birth experience better than my hospital birth. I had a higher comfort level, better baby bonding, and more robust post-birth care.

1. Higher comfort level with my home birth

The biggest difference between my hospital birth and my home birth was how much more comfortable I was at home. I found myself in exactly the same place as I was eighteen months before almost to the day. I was sitting at the kitchen table in the middle of the night.  Under the dim light I was scanning through my Hypnobabies book to find the early signs of labor. 

I’d felt what I thought could be amniotic fluid leaking earlier that night but it was too early.  I was only thirty-seven weeks. Less than forty eight hours later I was supposed to be standing up in my best friend’s wedding.   

Nervously, I texted my midwife and she asked if I was feeling any contractions.  I hadn’t been so far but very gradually they started.  My husband was sleeping on the couch after getting back from Chicago for work just several hours earlier.  He’d been working there all week. On a whim decided to come home so that we could drive together to the wedding the next day.  As my contractions grew stronger I started thinking that this baby might have other plans.  I was so thankful he was there with me.

My midwife came to me

I spent the next couple of hours in bed breathing through contractions and trying to figure out when I should ask the midwife to come.  After trying to gauge how close I was to active labor over phone she suggested that I get into the bath tub to help me relax.  Because she only lived fifteen minutes away we decided to wait a little longer before having her come. 

When I stood up to get into the tub it was clear that this baby was ready to come. I suddenly began to feel pushy and told my husband to call the midwife. The blow up pool I’d ordered to give birth in had not arrived yet so I would be giving birth in our bathtub.  It wasn’t as roomy as I would have liked but it worked.  The midwife arrived and after three pushes we met our sweet little girl.

We didn’t have to drive to the hospital

What I loved about the home birth was not having to leave my house and go to the hospital. Knowing when it’s time to leave for the hospital can be stressful. One recommendation from my hypnobabies course was to not rush to the hospital. Often, first time moms will arrive to the hospital too early which can stall labor. So when I was in early labor with my son I stayed home as long as possible. In between painful contractions that had me stopping to breathe, I showered, I braided my hair, I packed my hospital bag.

We had a 45 minute drive to the hospital which was something I’d been nervous about. I squeezed into the front of Joe’s truck with all of our baby gear in the back. I put in my headphones and started listening to my meditation tracks.

I’m so thankful I had those tracks to keep me calm. I was able to keep breathing through my contractions and progressing labor on the way to the hospital. By the time we got into our delivery room I was fully dilated and ready to push. But needless to say, it was a pretty uncomfortable experience.

I trusted my home birth midwife

A huge part of my comfort level with Caroline was really trusting my home birth midwife. When I was in labor with my son, neither of the two midwives I’d been seeing were able to be there on the night of our baby’s birth. The nurse called the on-call doctor who was also trained in water births.

The nurse started filling the tub and by the time I was in and ready to start pushing, not only had the doctor arrived so had the mid-wife in training. It was such a relief to see a familiar face. This midwife had been at several of my appointments and I’m so thankful she was able to be there for our baby’s birth. She did a great job helping me find comfortable positions. She applied pressure to my back and helped me know when to push harder and when to rest.

Although I had a positive experience with my hospital care-givers, I didn’t have the level of trust that I built with my home birth midwife when I was pregnant with my daughter.

2. Better baby bonding with my home birth

I was lucky to have special bonding time with both of my babies. One of the most special memories I have from my son’s birth was snuggling with him on my chest just after being born. I saw he was a baby boy and it just felt so perfect. Everything felt as it was supposed to be.

Unfortunately, that only lasted a short time and before I knew it I was being ushered out of the tub. DJ was taken to be checked out. I felt like we were just being pushed through assembly line.

With Caroline the experience felt very different. Seconds after she was born. I held her close to me and we spent the next hour in the tub waiting for the placenta to detach and practicing nursing.  I’m so thankful for that undisturbed time we had together.

When we were ready, our midwife helped me into bed and placed Caroline in my arms.  We would spend the rest of the day and much of the upcoming weeks this way, cozied in our home together.

3. More robust postpartum care with my home birth

After my home birth I felt like a strong mama being cared for. After my hospital birth I felt like a patient being monitored. This difference was really noticeable when it came to how I felt as a new mama. Our home birth midwife was so wonderful in making sure I had everything I needed to feel comfortable and confident caring for myself and my new baby.

One-on-one care from my home birth midwife

After my hospital birth there was always a rotating door of nurses in and out. This was really a challenge for me when I was learning to nurse my son because we needed a lot of extra help. We used a syringe to feed him donor milk and later pumped milk until he was able to nurse with the nipple shield. On top of that, I got mastitis and had to take antibiotics.

The resources the nurses provided were the reason I didn’t give up and was able to nurse my son for a whole year. I can’t help but wonder how our experience would have been different, though, if we had been in the care of the home birth midwife for my son. Like we did with my daughter, we could have spent the time we needed, right away when he was first born, to get him to latch. The one-on-one attention from our midwife was really important. I think with her knowledge and care we could have had a much easier time nursing.

Support when we needed extra care

When Caroline was just a few days old she got RSV. This was another time I was so thankful to be in the care of our home birth midwife. She kept us calm in a very scary situation and gave us the resources we needed to monitor Caroline. We felt empowered to take care of our sweet little girl and educated about what it would look like if she needed care beyond what we could give her. Our midwife kept checking in on us and it was so important that she was in our corner through that experience.

My hospital birth was good but my home birth was so much better

Although I had a good hospital birth, there are important aspects of a home birth that a hospital birth really can’t offer. I think a big reason I had a positive experience at the hospital was because I showed up fully dilated. I credit to my Hypnobabies mediations. The qualities I loved about my home birth like high comfort level, better baby bonding, and more robust postpartum care are things I didn’t know I was missing with the hospital birth. Now that I’ve experienced them I will choose a home birth over and over again.

Episode links

CHECK OUT HYPNOBABIES and use code motheringjoy10 for 10% off

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